A Conversation with Karen Casey, a World Leader in Recovery

A Conversation with Karen Casey, a World Leader in Recovery

Episode 29

Helen Sneed: Welcome to Mental Health Hope and Recovery. I'm Helen Sneed.

Valerie Milburn: And I'm Valerie Milburn.

Helen Sneed: We both have fought and overcome severe chronic mental illnesses. Our podcast offers a unique approach to mental health conditions. We use practical skills and inspirational stories of recovery. Our knowledge is up close and personal.

Valerie Milburn: Helen and I are your peers. We're not doctors, therapists or social workers. We're not professionals, but we are experts. We are experts in our own lived experience with multiple mental health diagnoses and symptoms. Please join us on our journey.

Helen Sneed: We live in recovery, so can you.

Valerie Milburn: This podcast does not provide medical advice. The information presented is not intended to be a substitute for or relied upon as medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. The podcast is for informational purposes only. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health providers with any health related questions you may have.

Helen Sneed: Welcome to episode 29, a conversation with Karen Casey, World Leader in Recovery. Well, Valerie and I are deeply thrilled and honored to have the legendary Karen Casey as our guest. Today will be celebrating the 40th anniversary edition of her groundbreaking book, each a new daily Meditations for Women and also looking at her most recent book, Her 31st, which she wrote during the pandemic. And then we'll follow with an in depth exploration of substance use, disorder and mental health with this renowned leader in the recovery universe. Valerie and I are so fortunate to have such a great woman and healer on our podcast and and we're delighted that you and the audience have joined us.

Valerie Milburn: And I'm delighted to introduce Karen Casey. Karen's groundbreaking first book in 1982 began as her journal Writings. From that heartfelt start, Karen has become a guide for women throughout the world, a guide for recovery from substance use, codependency, and mental health issues. Her work has guided me and supported me for my 23 years of sobriety. Karen's private life includes a series of great adventures. She and her husband Joe spent years crossing the country on their Harleys. When they decided to pursue a safer ride, this one in the air, Joe piloted them on long flights in a two section Piper, Pacer. AA and Al Anon have been Karen's path to 46 years of recovery. And her work is legendary in the recovery community. Karen's publisher, Jan Johnson, said of Karen, most of all, her words teach us to live in the present moment of our days, whatever they may bring. Karen, Helen and I are so pleased to have you here today to share your words with us and our listeners. Welcome.

Helen Sneed: Yes, we want to welcome you.

Speaker A: Well, thank you so much. I'm so appreciative that you've invited me to be a part of this program and to meet you both face to face. So I'm just. I mean, this is the. The thrill of my day, I assure you.

Valerie Milburn: Great. Ours too.

Helen Sneed: It is of ours, too. And, Karen, what we said we wanted to start off with is really, it's a celebration, and we're just going to give our listeners a little background,

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Helen Sneed: so. Karen Casey wrote her first book in 1982 during her own struggle for sobriety and faith. Each day a new beginning. Daily Meditations for Women, One of the first recovery books written for women. It has sold 4 million copies. To celebrate its phenomenal impact, a 40th anniversary edition of the classic has been released with a new forward by Marianne Williamson. As Williamson says, you can't read it in the morning and not be prepared for a better day. So through this book alone, Karen has reached millions of people. Now, that includes Valerie, me, and we would like to share our favorite meditations from the book. So I'm going to go first with something that I probably will read every day for the rest of my Life. It's from February 5th, and the quote is, don't compromise yourself. You are all you've got. And the great philosopher who said it is Janis Joplin. Now, here is the meditation. When we don't know who we are, it's easy to compromise ourselves. When we don't know where we stand on an issue, it's easy to be swayed by a forceful voice. Values may be cloudy in our minds or we may not be aware of them at all. It's then that we are vulnerable to the persuasion of another. In this 12 step program we are offered the way to know ourselves. We are supported in our efforts and we realize we have friends who don't want us to compromise ourselves, who value our struggle to know and to be true to ourselves. One of recovery's greatest gifts is discovering we can make decisions that represent us, our inner selves, and those decisions please us. We all are familiar with the tiny tug of shame that locates itself in our solar plexus when we go along. When we give in on a personally important issue, we pay a consequence. We lose a bit of ourselves over the years. We've lost many bits. We have a choice, however, and here's the takeaway. I will have a chance soon to act according to my wishes. I will take it.

Valerie Milburn: I love that. Now mine is from March 20 and the great philosopher quote is from Pearl Bailey and she said there's a period of life where we swallow a knowledge of ourselves and it becomes either good or sour inside. For too many of us, feelings of shame, even self hatred, are paramount. None of us has a fully untarnished past. Every person, even every child, experiences regret over some action. We are not perfect. Perfection is not expected in the Divine plan. We are expected to take our experiences and grow from them, to move beyond the shame of them, to celebrate what they have taught us. Each day offers us a fresh start at assimilating all that we have been. What has gone before enriches who we are now. And through the many experiences we've survived, we have been prepared to help others to smooth the way for another person, perhaps who is searching for a new direction. We can let go of our shame and know instead that it sweetens the nuggets of the wisdom we can offer to others. We are alike. We are not without faults. Our trials help another to smoother sailing. I will relish the joy at hand. I can share my wisdom all painful past brighten someone's future Future when openly shared.

Helen Sneed: Oh, thank you. Thank you, Valerie. I guess I should say thank you, Karen. Yes. In the ensuing four decades since each day a new beginning, Karen has become recognized as an international authority on spirituality, relationships and personal growth. In many of her 31 books, she uses the challenges of her own life to point out methods and skills for forging a path to recovery from mental health issues. And she beautifully recounts the profound yearnings for fulfillment that often accompanies her on the journey. Her autobiography, My Story to Yours, A Guided Memoir for Writing your Recovery Journey, relates the extraordinary course of her own life and recovery. It's a story you won't forget. I cannot recommend this book enough. And then there's her most recent book, written during the

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Helen Sneed: pandemic. Each day a renewed beginning, Meditations for a peaceful Journey. It provides comfort and guidance in the aftermath of the pandemic needed by so many who are struggling to move on and reclaim their lives.

Valerie Milburn: So, Karen, while we're talking about your books, there's one in particular I want to mention, and that is a woman's spirit. More Meditations for women. Yeah. Now. Yeah. I want to tell you an anecdote about this book. My first sponsor gave me this book about 20 years ago and I still read it. And my sponsors inscription in your book has empowered and guided me these many years. So I want to ask you, do you ever think about how many of your books have had a ribbon wrapped around them, been passed from person to person and enhanced their connection?

Speaker A: You know, I tell you, it is so hard to fathom how this has all happened. I mean, it truly is. You know, I, as I think you, you mentioned, I didn't start out to write a book for women. You know, I was journaling, trying to find my own experience with God because I didn't come into the rooms of Alcoholics Anonymous with any connection to a higher power. And so I didn't have any idea that my journaling was going to become a book. And so when I think about all of these years and all of these books and the fact that they have been passed on to others, honestly, you too? I. I don't know how to even. I. I don't know how to even think about that idea. It. You know, it. My life has unfolded the way I think that it was in the way I think it was meant to unfold, even though I didn't know that it was going to unfold this way. But I think that there were no accidents along the way. But I had no idea when I was this scared kid who was so chronically depressed, really, and had no idea how I fit into this family I was in or into the world around me. I could never have imagined that my life was going to become what it has become.

Valerie Milburn: You're right, it's not. And the paths we go on in our lives and you know, you and I have been on a sobriety path for a long time. And you mentioned something that you and I have in common and you mentioned your struggle with depression and that's something we share. And I wanted to ask you, you know, when did Coming to terms with your mental health issue of depression and also of anxiety become an essential part of your recovery?

Speaker A: Well, you know, it's like, not soon enough, I'll tell you, because, you know, as a kid, I had no idea that that was really the. What was going on with me. You know, I. And sometimes I look back at when I took that first drink at age 13 and think, well, you know, that was opening a wonderful door for me, even though I didn't realize it at the time, but it seemed to quiet that anxiety that I had. And I think that that's probably true for lots of people that they take a drink and they suddenly think that, oh, wow, I fit in after all. There's nothing to be so anxious about. But the anxiety was so prevalent for so many years, and it wasn't until I was quite a number of years. You know, I got sober in 76, and it wasn't until 1991 that I ever was prescribed. Not because my doctor didn't want me to take antidepressants, but finally, in 1991, I gave in. And I say I gave in because in those early days of recovery, you didn't. If you talked about depression or if you talked about anxiety, people just said, oh, well, you're not going to enough meetings. Well, h*** spells I was going to meetings as I could. And if you said you were seeing a doctor about your depression, it was. It. It was assumed that you were probably not really on the. On the program anymore.

Valerie Milburn: Unfortunately, that has changed to a great extent.

Speaker A: That has changed, but, boy, it hadn't changed

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Speaker A: then. And so I went on. She convinced me. She said, karen, I know other women in AA who are on an antidepressant. Please give it a try.

Valerie Milburn: Right, right.

Speaker A: And it was life saving for me. It really was.

Valerie Milburn: Right. And absolutely. I'm so glad that has changed. And so you told us a little bit about how you succeeded in dealing with this anxiety and depression. And do you have advice for others who are living with what's called a dual diagnosis, having a substance use disorder and another mental health issue? I know for me, sobriety was the bottom line. But with a dual diagnosis, I know you'll agree that you have to deal with both at the same time. And what advice can you give for someone who has what we call a dual diagnosis?

Speaker A: Well, first of all, I would say that I would. I would say that most people. And I'm still very, very active in both AA and Alani, I would say that most people that I'm in meetings with would Consider themselves dually diagnosed. They would consider that they not only have alcoholism, but they have other issues as well. I would say to people who are uncomfortable and feel like they need something more, that they openly talk about it with somebody that they know in the rooms or with a doctor that they feel knows them pretty well and get some guidance to a therapist who can help. But they will probably find out because I hear it all the time at meetings that if they bring up the whole topic of you guys, I feel I struggling so with some depression. And people will say, I'll talk to you after the meeting and let you know what it is I have done. Because it is so much more openly discussed now.

Valerie Milburn: Well, the research backs it up that substance use disorder is often accompanied by another mental health issue. And you're right. And Helen and I talk all the time about isolation being so almost deadly and that it's important to talk about it and reach out and not be alone.

Speaker A: Yeah.

Valerie Milburn: And that is right. Leads us into the next thing we wanted to talk about relationship.

Helen Sneed: Karen, I've been really wanting to ask you about this. It's the. It's the whole subject of relationships, which we know are for so. So, so critical and. And, you know, one of life's great joys, you know, and riches. And so I. A couple questions. The first one is, in your own recovery, were there relationships you had to change in order to stay on the right path?

Speaker A: You know, that kind of makes me laugh. Like all of them. When I first came into to recovery, it's like everybody that I had been really involved with, they were mostly sitting on a nearby barstool. It was a stark realization that I had to literally start over with friendships.

Helen Sneed: But.

Speaker A: But, you know, you guys, I was so codependent. And that is such a huge issue in for. And then that fits so well into the whole theme of relationships. I think so often that my codependency preceded my alcoholism that as a kid, as a child, I was constantly. And I don't think this is an unusual thing at all. I was constantly focusing my attention on others to see how they were responding to me. And there was always that sense of, do they like me? Do I fit? And I mean, it was just crazy making. And it was partly because of growing up in a family that never talked about anything.

Helen Sneed: So bearing that in mind and coming from such a deprivation, in a way, if you want to call it that, from your childhood on, what relationships in your life turned out to be the most sustaining when you had to sort of start from scratch I went to.

Speaker A: An Al anon meeting in 1974. I had no idea. I'd never heard of the word Al Anon before. But I went to an Al Anon meeting here in Minneapolis. And I walked in and I knew nobody. But what I also realized,

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Speaker A: and it was men and women, but I also realized was that it was the first time I had walked in to a gathering of total strangers. And I did not feel uncomfortable. I felt as though I belonged. And I ended up sitting there observing all of these gestures of acceptance and love. And I thought, my gosh, I've never seen anything like this before. And I knew that when I left that night that I would be back. But then about 18 months later, when it was suggested that probably my additional issue was AA was like, really? Because I thought, I mean, I was a pretty high functioning alcoholic when I came to realize, but I really, because I had watched my first husband, in essence, flunk out of graduate school. But when she said, I think you need aa, and I went in and she said, somebody from the group here will take you that next week. And I went. And I walked in and this is the sign of the classic codependent who didn't really understand anything at all. I walked in and it was about 200 people. They were all about my age, mid-30s to mid-40s. I was 36 at the time. And they were probably over half men. And I looked around and I thought, oh my God, this is where I should have been all along. Look at all these good looking, sober men. And that was honest to God feeling. Look at all of these good looking, sober men. I had no idea that I was really there to get help from me. And I had a bottle of. And I had been a daily drinker for years, and I had a bottle of Jack Daniels at home in my kitchen on the counter. And between the time I went to that meeting and I got home, the thought of ever taking another drink had simply evaporated. And I went in and I poured that out. But when I came into aa, two women, I don't want to say pounced on me, but kind of they did. And as a matter of fact, they're women who are still in my life today after all of these years, who said to me probably the best thing anybody ever said to me early on, Karen, you're not here to have a relationship with a man. You're here to have a relationship with yourself and other women. And for the first year, you simply must adhere to that.

Helen Sneed: Well, you know, it's interesting because what you're talking about is really what Valerie is going to touch on. We're sort of going from sort of the one on one relationships into community, right?

Valerie Milburn: Yeah. And you, you talked mainly about the importance of 12 step programs as your positive communities to support you when you first got sober. Are there any other types of communities that supported you that were central to your recovery?

Speaker A: Well, you know, I, I did get into, you know, as I got into recovery and, and felt more sustained by recovery, it was much easier

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Speaker A: for me to become part of other groups like book. You know, I mean I was really because of just loving to read. I got into book clubs, I took writing, I was involved in some writing groups, you know, so I looked, it was a lot, I was a lot more comfortable being part of other communities. But the primary communities for me for many, many years, and that continues today are my communities of AA and Alanat. And you know, I have tons of friends lots of places and I do lots of things and I've always been in volunteer activities over the years and I'll always be involved in that way too. And I've also been involved as part of my community has been A Course in Miracles. And I have been very involved for more than 35 years with a Course in Miracles. And I don't know how familiar the two of you are with A Course in Miracles, but it's a spiritual pathway that's very complementary actually to AA and Al Anon. They're older than A Course in Miracles but its focus is on embracing people. It focuses on not seeing ourselves at odds and separate from others, but seeing ourselves as willingly embracing others and helping others to walk a path of peace.

Valerie Milburn: You talked about the importance of volunteer work, and we know how critical it is to recovery. And what do you recommend about volunteer work? Different types you can talk about or how to be involved in it, what you get from it?

Speaker A: I don't think there is anything that helps our own sense of well being, whether we're in recovery or not. There isn't anything that helps us better in life than to focus on somebody else besides ourselves.

Helen Sneed: What I found is that. Is that it's. That so much of it is about action, being able to take action. And that was something that I was so sick and so paralyzed really for. For decades that I couldn't. And I don't even know as I look back how I did it. But I think that's what you're describing is having the. The wherewithal to take action for others and to get pulled out of yourself, sort of. And that's. That's what I think is just the advice that you're giving, which is terrific.

Speaker A: Absolutely. Because I don't think there is any more potent healing for ourselves than to reach out and try to help somebody else.

Valerie Milburn: Exactly.

Speaker A: You know, I think at the time, initially, we think that we're just helping them. Wrong. You know, we are so helped every time we reach out to somebody else. You know, I mean, there are so many ways we can make our lives better and in the process, the lives of other people better too. And, you know, I sit here with the two of you and I think of how grateful I am that my journey included addiction, that my journey included being a totally out of control, crazy alcoholic woman. Because, you know, and I. There isn't anything that I can point to in my life, even those painful periods, because there were certainly lots of them. But there isn't anything that I can point to now that I don't see as crucial to being a door opener for something that I needed next to experience in order to end up getting ultimately here with the two of you.

Helen Sneed: Just keep providing us with our lead ins to the next set of questions. This is remarkable. Karen, you're amazing. Interesting. Which is wanting to sort of look at some insights into the recovery process which you just begun to. You just mentioned one that was so. These that were so critical for you. Do you, as you look back, what were some major turning points in your own recovery? You know, those landmarks that you look back and go, oh, thank heavens, like you just said that, that being an alcoholic was maybe the first one. I don't know one of them.

Speaker A: Well, you know, I've certainly had a lot of them and some of them would probably not, not look to everybody like a very positive turning point. But, but it was, you know, when, when my first husband walked out, it turned me into the, the search for other bad relationships and every one

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Speaker A: of those led me closer to the recovery rooms. So I look at that marriage as a key turning point, even though at the time it felt like a devastating turning point. But after about 18 months I was really feeling absolutely disconnected from the whole world. Never the thought of drink had crossed my mind, but I once again thought of suicide. And I had had suicidal thoughts as a kid and I never thought it through completely. But as a kid I used to think it wouldn't matter if I wasn't here anymore. But at 18 months I was pretty committed to the idea of suicide. And so I had everything planned. I hadn't gone to teach my classes that week, I hadn't gone to the classes that I took. I, that evening I. Or that afternoon I turned the gas on or that was my intent to turn the gas on the stove. I had folded up all of the towels I owned to tuck in around the windows of my one bedroom apartment. And just as I was getting ready to place those towels, there was a loud knock at my door and I wasn't expecting anybody. And I said, who is there? And she said pat. And she said, and I said pat who? And she told me her last name and she said, we have an appointment. I went to the door and opened it just a little bit and there stood a very tall, very attractive red haired woman with her hair up in a bun in the back. And she said, I'm here to discuss finances. You made an appointment with me. I'm a financial planner. And that was just unheard of. I lived in a hundred dollar a month apartment. I taught at the University of Minnesota as a lowly, lowly, lowly instructor making almost no money at all. There was no reason for me to have made an appointment with a financial planner. But anyway, she came in and she looked at me and she said, are you okay? And I said, no, I'm not. I'm really depressed. And at that she just walked right into my kitchen and sat down uninvited and she said, I know a little bit about depression. I've been depressed and so has my husband and he's a recovering alcoholic. And she said, Let me tell you what depression really is. And I just sat there and hung on every word. And she said, you're on the precipice of a new spiritual awakening. That's what depression is. And it was like I didn't know whether to believe her or not. All I knew is that her calming voice absolutely changed how I felt right away. And I knew that somehow she had been sent. You know, this isn't. This wasn't a financial planner. I mean, I don't know how you both feel, but it gives me goosebumps. I think that I really have come to believe that there are angels on assignment, that somehow they're present to help us. And I choose to think that Pat was an angel on assignment, or I would not be here today talking to you. So those were major turning points. I want to mention the most significant turning point, because the man I had taken a job at Hazeldon, not because I was a counselor or anything, but I took a job. And. And I was working in the area of marketing, which I knew nothing about, but they said, well, you have a PhD. You'll figure it out. But the man who was president of Hazelden took an interest in me and my recovery. And he said, how are you doing? And I said, well, I struggle a lot with knowing God, but I'm journaling a lot about it. And one day he said out of the clear blue, you guys, he said, would you mind bringing in your journaling? I'd love to see what some of it is. Which was a highly unusual. And, you know, journaling is pretty personal. But he was such a nice man, such a gentleman, and I like him a lot. And so I said, sure, you know, I'll bring it in. Well, you guys, that's what made this book a reality, because I brought in. And a couple weeks later, he called me into

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Speaker A: his office, and, Karen, I think you have a book here for women. And I said, what? And he said, I think other women need to read this. You're not the only one that struggles to know and have a relationship with God, that struggles as you have struggled with your own recovery.

Valerie Milburn: That's so powerful.

Speaker A: Yeah, isn't that. That is totally amazing. So I think all the time, were it not for Harry Swift, this would not have ever happened.

Helen Sneed: Well, you know, Karen, the name of our. Of our podcast is. Is. Is Hope and Recovery. And so we're. You've been. You're just great to go over all this recovery with you. I. With us. I have one sort of an overarching question. We all know that, that, that the recovery process is very individual. You know, person to person, how someone goes have such a broad perspective and having worked with thousands of people. And I'm just wondering, are there any universal patterns that you see in recovery or is it just all just depends too much, so much on the individual that you can't make any sweeping statements?

Speaker A: Well, you know, it's probably. I mean, it is individual. But I also think that nobody has a good recovery if they cut themselves off from others. Recovery does not happen in isolation. I think that we feed on each other's hope, which is why I have remained so committed after all of these years to continuing, going to meetings and always encouraging my sponsors and my friends in general that real recovery happens for us as we gather in groups because we are buoyed up by the stories we hear each other tell. And that's what feeds our own hope, that if we go to a meeting and we're feeling down and out, I would say that 98% of the time you will leave that meeting feeling better because of the hope that is inspired by what you hear others say.

Valerie Milburn: Absolutely. And I like to say that recovery is not about sobriety. Recovery is about connection.

Speaker A: It is, it is.

Valerie Milburn: And I love everything you said about hope because one of the things we focus on, as Helen just said, is hope on this podcast, it's even in the name of our podcast. And I do want to ask you a question first about when hope is lost. And then we're going to wrap up with the positive part about what you see as hopeful for you today about people in recovery. So let me ask you, what is your advice for those terrible moments when all hope is lost?

Speaker A: Well, you know, I. I've certainly had some of those moments, as I've shared already, but. But what I know what has. What worked for me was unbeknownst to me, somebody came to my door. And so it was really the presence of somebody else that brought me out of where I was to believe that, that it was possible to move forward.

Helen Sneed: Very inspirational. And I guess that this. It's appropriate to close this conversation with hope, especially after what, how you put it so eloquently, Karen. And to you, we want to express our profound gratitude for your enthusiasm, your generosity and your wisdom, not just today, but for your many gifts to people everywhere who are so in need of your insights and compassion. It's interesting. You once said, that's the real beauty of our lives. We are always here to be truly helpful in one way or another. These are inspirational Words, I think, for all of us, because your work, your life, your presence here today embodied this ideal. So on behalf of millions, we say thank you.

Speaker A: Oh, thank you so much. You know, there is a. I just want to close myself by saying one thing. You know, I've mentioned A Course in Miracles, which has been so profoundly important in my life these past 35 years. But early in the pages of A

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Speaker A: A Course in Miracles, there is a prayer that begins with, I am here only to be truly helpful. And there are a few more lines, and it's a beautiful prayer. I am here only to be truly helpful. I am here to represent him who sent me. I do not have to worry about what to say or what to do, because he who sent me will direct me. I am content to be wherever he sends me, knowing he goes there with me. I will be healed as I let him teach me to heal. And I think about that. You know, it's like that's the key, I think, not only for our own lives, but for the lives of all the people who, as I said, cross our paths intentionally.

Valerie Milburn: That's beautiful.

Helen Sneed: Thank you. That, well, probably will cry if, if, if I don't allow Valerie to lead us into our mindfulness exercise, which we do, Karen, we do at the end of every episode. So, Valerie, thank you. Can you do it?

Valerie Milburn: And I can do it. And thank you, Karen. I just can't thank you enough. And yes, we will close with our traditional mindfulness exercise. And what is mindfulness? I always give a definition. Mindfulness is a mental state achieved by focusing one's awareness on the present moment while calmly acknowledging and accepting one's feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations without judgment. Today's mindfulness practice is called Breathing in the Positive and Letting Go of the Negative. It focuses on our breathing, using our breath to bring in positive thoughts and emotions and let go of negative thoughts and emotions. You know, this practice helped me tremendously this week. It helped me with something that was new and exciting and difficult. We have just launched our new website, mental healthhopeandrecovery.com our developer, Vanity Fire photo, did a fabulous job. But you know what? Now it's my time to maintain the website. I had to learn how to edit a website, Edit, embed recordings, add links, move graphics. This was all new to me and a bit overwhelming. So here's the mindfulness part. To help me face this task, I chose a few things I wanted to focus on during my morning mindfulness practice. I wanted to focus on having love and patience with myself as I learned my new Skills and to let go of negativity and judgment of myself. So I integrated these four words, love and patience and negativity and judgment, into my mindfulness breathing. Let's do this together. Let's get mindful. We will begin, as always, with our diaphragmatic breathing. If you are driving or walking, please adapt this mindfulness exercise in such a way that it works in your current surroundings. If you can find a comfortable seated position, try closing your eyes if it's safe to do so. Inhale through your nose, expanding an imaginary balloon in your stomach. Hold your breath. Exhale through your mouth, pulling your stomach in as you do. Take another inhale through your nose, expanding that imaginary balloon. Exhale through your mouth, pulling your stomach in. Drop your shoulders. Pull your stomach all the way in. Continue with this deep, regular breathing. Let's practice this mindfulness exercise with a couple rounds of breath, using the words I chose with your slow, steady breathing. Focus on the words love and patience as you breathe in. And focus on the words judgment and negativity as you breathe out. Say to yourself, breathe in, love and patience. Breathe out. Judgment and negativity. Breathe in, love and patience. Breathe out, judgment

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Valerie Milburn: and negativity. Now think of two words that represent a thought, an emotion, something you would like to bring into or enhance in your life. What are two positive words for you? Next, think of two words that represent a thought or an emotion that you would like to eliminate or reduce in your life. What are your two negative words? Go back to that slow, deep breathing. Tell yourself the two positive words as you breathe in and breathe out the two negative words. Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out. If your eyes are closed, please gently open them and bring yourself back to the room. When I do this exercise, I continue the practice until a deep sense of serenity descends. It doesn't take long. Thank you for doing this mindfulness exercise with me.

Helen Sneed: Oh, thank you, Valerie. That was some for me, some. Some excellent breathing. Now, Valerie mentioned this, but we have just launched our new and first website, mentalhealthhopeandrecovery.com for us, this is a long held dream because it gives us the opportunity to communicate with you, our listeners, and to keep you updated on our podcast and activities and for you to get back to us because we're dying to hear from you. So we hope you'll visit it soon. Mental health, hope and recovery.com this is a really big deal. Now, in our next episode, Valerie and I are facing down what Winston Churchill called the Black Dog, or as Abraham Lincoln put it if there is a place worse than h***, I am in it. They were referring to depression, of course. The World Health Organization ranks depression as the single largest contributor to global disability worldwide, that is physical and mental disability. It is number one. We encourage you to join us as we investigate depression, its impact, and treatment methods for recovery from its powerful grip. And until then, I leave you with our favorite word. Onward.